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> Is like my great grandpa scolding us at the dinner table for laughing and talking

It's more like a non-familial, formal dinner setting. Think about a job interview where the CEO and interviewer take you and another interviewee to dinner in a fancy restaurant. You turn up in jeans and sneakers with your buddy and you laugh and crack jokes together, the other interviewee turns up in smart clothes and talks soberly. In a few cases (and perhaps only seen in Holywood movies about the American Dream) the CEO may love the irreverence and impertinence and see it as a strength and sign of strong individuality, in almost all cases the bosses will not appreciate it and you will not get a job. Great grandpa loves you, the boss at your place of work doesn't.



Surely you are aware that a lot of the people on this site interview in their jeans


If the CEO invites you to dinner at a high end restaurant hopefully you change into something a bit nicer.


He's in jeans too


Y'all are wearing pants??


New boss: "Why are you wearing a dragon fursuit?"

Candidate: "Dress for the job you want"

Boss: "Hired! Welcome to Fort Knox"


If I showed up at a work event with a dragon fursuit, my boss would be like:

"Okay, what's the punchline?"


"… and the barman says, 'Why the long face?'"

"… and orders a Flaming Sambuca"

"… so I asked him for a light"


Blazer and jeans, of course.


I'm sorry to disappoint


While the metaphor they chose may conflict with your personal experiences, you should still be able to do a good-faith reading of it and realize the underlying point.

But nah, probably better to nitpick over the details.

Would it make more sense if it was a funeral instead? A wedding?


The metaphor is perfect. Access and outcome depend on your ability to acquire and maintain a suit/lawyer, including knowing where and when to deploy.


I agree that the metaphor is good. The point is understood. However, the specific clothes that are considered OK in one context ore another are always changing and based in criteria that most of the time makes no sense.


I don't think it's nitpicking when I'm talking about technology tropes on a technology-focused site


No reason for disappointment, but you likely won't be invited back.


Um, this is highly region dependent. If it were a hot day, I would be comfortable interviewing with a CEO in nice shorts and a clean t-shirt, and fully expect that they'd dress similarly.


The example wasn't just "an interview" it was "a high end restaurant" but TBF the outcome is indeed highly dependent on both region and the personal preference of the CEO.


I'm not sure I'd be interested in interviewing with a CEO who can't be bothered to dress up. Hot weather is not a reason not too with AC and fabrics specifically for hot weather.


I would say that job interview in the fancy restaurant is the first "unprofessional" step in this chain. The place to conduct serious interviews is called the office.


At my company when we bring you onsite for an interview takes you to lunch. The person who takes you to lunch is not allowed to talk to the people making the hiring decisions. You can thus talk about whatever you want. It is a relaxing situation where you can safely press about what work is like. If you talk about something that in an interview is illegal (likely family) it doesn't matter because that person doesn't have a say on if you are hired.

(I encourage anyone who does interviewing to have a similar policy - if someone flys in to talk to you that means you are buying them meals anyway. Ensuring there is time to talk about things that might or might not matter is important)

For engineers we wouldn't go to a fancy restaurant. However I'd expect executives probably would.


Why would interviewees believe you? I have heard such claims before and assumed they were false and treated lunch as just continuing the interview while doing something we all had to do anyway. If the interviewee raised numerous red flags, the interviewer would absolutely be sworn to silence? Even informally?

I don’t work in tech.


I wouldn't blame them for not. However our integraty means we will anyway. And that the lunch people don't have a voice is carefullp monitored by hr just in case something goes to court.


For higher tier jobs, the setting can be wherever looks good. I've met and been hired by CTOs at a local coffee shop and an Indian buffet. Nothing about a meeting room in an office is more conducive to an interview than a shaded patio with a nice chai.




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