In other words, you don't respect the other person enough to abide by the obligation that you created by agreeing to a 9 am meeting.
If you don't want 9 am meetings, don't accept them. If you do, you're obligated to show up on time, and you are being selfish and petulant by your willful refusal to set an alarm clock because you don't like it.
And I don't. The part with the alarm was not about meetings I set myself. That is about meetings I have to be present at planned by others. Anyway it all sounds worse now than it is and I guess it is culteral. I had a meeting in Florida a few weeks ago: we were 45 minutes late because of traffic and could not reach the client (who was very religious, another hard thing coming from Europe). When we arrived (my colleague being stressed, me not so much) the client was not even there and came in 1 hour after that. Not sure if it is NYC and Silcon Valley or whatever: the rest of the world do not seem to care as much as some people do here (who seem to get actually angry which proves my point: you will die young if you care about things so insignificant). Imho ofcourse.
If you don't want 9 am meetings, don't accept them. If you do, you're obligated to show up on time, and you are being selfish and petulant by your willful refusal to set an alarm clock because you don't like it.